I know someone who recently killed themselves, and it has brought up a lot of emotions for me, seeing that I've failed at ending my own life a couple times. Thoughts of wishing I could go too, feeling left out, wanting to join. I wish I could say that I'm stronger than that, but the thoughts grab hold of me and I can't break free of them. Dealing with death is one thing, the person being young makes it harder, but the person succeeding where you failed makes you question everything.
Now, I'm not writing this to worry anyone, I'm just expressing myself. I thankfully don't feel impulsive, the thoughts are there but I have some control, so please don't freak out and read into this.
I ask you, have you ever lost someone near your age? How did you deal with the grief?
It's always a good thing to express yourself and get those feelings out there - love you - by the way Well Written. = HUGS
ReplyDeleteIt's not a failure that you didn't complete suicide. It's a will to live and try again. Completing suicide is not a success. It's defeat.
ReplyDeleteThe fact that you are still here, means that the Goddesses have something greater in mine for you. Just trust the Goddesses and let them take some of your pain. Not all, though, because sometimes the pain is the only thing that let's us know that we're alive.
I've lost several close friends to suicide just this past year. My thoughts are that their depression was so painful and debilitating, that their quality of life was unbearable. If I became physically ill to the point of being in pain and suffering and not able to live life and enjoy it, I'd want to be put out of my misery. Physical suffering is very similar to physical suffering. That being said, I've abuses myself and should have been dead many times over, but I've never tried to kill myself. Also, it does effect those close to the person. Not everyone is compassionate. Some are narcissistic.
ReplyDelete'Physical suffering is similar to Mental' suffering is what I meant to say...
ReplyDeleteI tried to preview and instead it published...